Shattered

There is a time for brokenness. A time when a mind that can't be bent is broken. A time when a person goes to pieces, swept up in a drama beyond comprension. A time when tension explodes within, but is followed by an implosion. A time of division when the appearance of unity dissolves. A time for radicalism- elements within rise up in a sudden violent fury, defying stricture, toppling structure- a destruction to be followed by a time for rebuilding- recreating what was, but differantly.

My fists clench. A willfullness within me clings obstinately to its desires, cursing the rest of me for weakness. Weakness of will? "It's not me that's weak", it retorts, "it's you- you won't follow through, you let me down." Stung by the allegation, I charge forth bravely but briefly into the pandemonium of the raging battle. Then the certainty of the nobility of my cause falls away, and then comes the time- the time when I must be shattered almost completely- almost but not quite- a replay of history enacted on a small scale, the scale of one man, a man defeated by his own actions.

Index

Forever and a Day

So I said forever, whatever forever means,
A series of scenes stretching endlessly off into infinity:
that's something I can't see or imagine, just how thinly
stretched out can reality be?

We say things without thinking of what they mean
My hope clings to things so elusive, so unseen
as to seem beyond all sense, did I hear you ask for evidence?

But then again, can there be an end? Isn't there a place,
a space beyond every horizon, however unimagined?
Forever's a hope undimmed, but on this you can depend:
in this world we live in, things come to an end

Index

The Way Forward (Rant No. 378)

There`s a way forward,
or so I`ve heard,
but I`m lost,
in a word,

hung up on a word,
A meaning was disinterred,
Consequences occured,

without rhyme or reason, if you think you`ve lost sight of them and now you`ll just see if you thought you could discount me! I`ll huff and I`ll puff and I`ll burn your house down and I`ll raze this whole town and I`ll raise the dead, bringing salvation through strife, a life for a life, a tooth for a tooth, my truth for your truth,

and truly I tell you that this is it, whatever "it" may be, so don`t think that you understand as I bellow my demand through a bullhorn, shorn of all compassion, honed to precision, no heart and all vision:

this is the sin by which I`ll win, and mark my words this is not the end, I can take or leave you, friend, don`t make me come over there, for in case you were unaware, I have at last returned, amidst the rubble of what burned; burned out rubble born of trouble yet the grass will grow and nature will reclaim her earth once again and then!

then will be the hour of which it has been said: "You will be born again, and it will be no better than the first time"

Sorry to sound so pessimistic, and I fear that this will stick through thick and thin, remember the Chesire cat grin,

remember the woodfire smoke,
remember good honest folk,
whatever happened to them anyway?

remember the games that we play,
making up the rules as we go along
Which ones are right, which ones are wrong,
is hard to say, but by them we play

or we don`t play at all,
and we fall,
and that`s about it

Index

Revolution in Circles

I’m bored, let`s have a revolution,
You know the kind I mean,
We stand there shouting slogans,
stomp around and scream.

I think a revolution would be
a way to have some fun,
to represent working folks,
without having to be one.

I stand in place of the people,
`cos the people aren`t there,
The people they are absent,
because they just don`t care

They don`t care because they are ignorant,
but never mind for I am sent
by historical forces, to be exact
On their behalf, I shall now act,

Why do you laugh? I make no joke
When your bourgeois life goes up in smoke
You'll wish you had tried to see
the folly
of being on the wrong side
of history

Index

Hanging out at the CLSC

I`ve been waiting on someone.
I`m wondering if someone will come.
I thought I knew who it was.
You ask me why, well, just because:

because I thought it meant something,
but who knows what each day will bring
My heart sinks with the sun each evening,
for the day`s end sees me with nothing

I`ve been waiting patiently, well, sort of, because you see,
I`m not such a patient guy, don`t have words to explain why.
I`ve been waiting to know what price, to know whether this sacrifice
might in fact suffice, and what I`m thinking`s not so nice
I`ve been waiting for some answers, instead some new question occurs to me, leaving me confused
I`ve been waiting for some news

I`ve been waiting for somebody
who seemed somewhat friendly when handling my file
but it`s been a long, long while,
well,

I thought it meant something,
who knows what each day will bring
My heart sinks with the sun each evening,
for the day`s end sees me with nothing

I`ve been waiting, bloated, I fear I`ll burst.
So why am I dying of thirst?
Hoped for the best, now I fear the worst.
It seems my name`s somehow been cursed.

I`ve been waiting for some word
from someone in authority,
but it`s recently occurred to me,
that it could take an eternity,

wondering if it meant anything,
but who knows what each day will bring
My heart sinks with the sun each evening
for the day`s end sees me with nothing

Index

Memories

Pictures of people you could never meet,
Photographs: didn't recognise that street,
There used to be a field running along it

I hear sounds made in some studio many years ago,
None of those who made them make a sound anymore

They remember him now,
They show a film made of him when he was young,
when his talent promised many things,
but other things got in the way.
He died the other day

He had his moment, then he lost it
Only he knew how much it cost him

Moments frozen, preserved,
Ghosts coming back to haunt,
Electronic memories,
Patterns form reminders,
when nothing else remains

Index

This Guy

He is like a stagnant pool,
Quite smooth on the surface
Breezes, falling leaves and twigs,
and animals will cause the occasional fleeting ripple
A moment later, it's like nothing ever happened

Yet he prides himself on his generosity
to those orbiting him,
Those with whose concerns he is unconcerned,
Props to make a point,
Tools to take and use,
Obstacles to break and conquer,

And their ingratitude puzzles him briefly,
like a blip on the radar screen,
Seen and then not seen,
Gone and then forgotten

There is a world outside him, though,
-that there's no mistaking-
full of things there for the taking,
At the time of his choosing,
At his every conveniance,
At his merest whim,
On the spur of the moment,
Spurring on the beast of burden,

What's this he tries to keep hidden?
What's this we see?
Are we too shy to say
what we see staring us in the face
in this place today?

Will he ever get his comeuppance,
in some future circumstance?
Does it matter?
See here and now,
hear and tell and know what he's become!

Index